Day 30, vigilance

I had a crisis this morning. With my sponsor being away for a few weeks, I had arranged with another Greysheeter to sponsor me temporarily for the duration. While I normally call my sponsor around noontime, this Greysheeter asked me to call in the morning. Not a problem; I noted it, confirmed it with her, put it in my diary and thought of it before going to bed last night. Then I woke up, carried out my morning routine without thinking, and had a start at 9am (long after when I should have called) when I realised I had forgotten!!!

My abstinence is very young. I can’t afford to take things easy, not now, not ever; I did manage to find another Greysheeter to commit my food to at 9am and I can say that I’m abstinent today, but whoa. I did think about what if I have to go back to Day 1, and the honest answer is… I would do it. And I wouldn’t binge just because it’s Day 1 anyway. Having had a taste of abstinence again, I want nothing more than to keep it – but I do have to be vigilant.

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