I was asked this question recently, about #10 meals. What are they? Obviously everybody has their own standby recipes they use over and over again, some people like to eat heavy and others eat light – I’m definitely a heavy eater – and I’m not about to get into food talk here (although I’d love to get recipes of your favourites, because I’m hopelessly un-creative!) but I wanted to explore the idea of #10 a little.
Quite simply, it means on a scale of 1-10, this meal is a 10. In other words, as good as it gets!
Not all my meals in GS are #10s. Sometimes it’s travel, other times it’s convenience or lack of time; I don’t always eat awesome meals. Not all, but many of them are awesome! My first sponsor encouraged me to go for the best food, the ones I liked best from the Greysheet, and this kept me abstinent for a long time. Looking forward to the next meal. I used to have this awesome breakfast that I wanted so much that it kept me abstinent in these first evenings/nights – my reward.
These days, I still choose the best I can, and looking forward to meals is certainly part of what keeps me abstinent! But, not every meal has to be awesome. I think that’s because I generally have the best – that’s why I can let go of it sometimes, if need be. I know that if the next meal isn’t so good, the one after that will be great. I know that if I’m travelling for the week, I can let go of awesome food (and subsist on backup if I have to) because I know that’s not always what it’s like. My gut is finally learning that awesome food is the default and that’s why I don’t have to hang on to every meal.
Before abstinence, every meal was either a first one or a last one. The last meal (before the diet) was huge, awesome, tasty – and left me feeling worthless, bloated, and hating myself. The first meal (of the diet) was small, sensible, pedestrian. Nothing to get excited about. Looking into the future of having only such meals was a bleak prospect, indeed. So I would hang on to the diet for as long as I could hang on, but it was a bleak, sad existence: until the craving got back to me and it was back to the awesome food! (in uncontrollable masses).
That is one reason why I believe the Greysheet works for me. It’s anything but bleak! I have the most awesome foods – I still choose what my first sponsor used to call “the golden food” (as in, best of the best – not silver, not bronze). I don’t need to look beyond my own plate because my plate is plentiful and tasty (I no longer have to choose either-or)!
I love my food. I don’t do fancy things to it. I eat so simply, but oh my, it’s my reward and what I look forward to and what keeps me abstinent a day at a time… life is good!