Two things I want to share about today.
1 – Last weekend
I’m happy to be back home after what seemed like a very long weekend. I had volunteered to help run a ministry weekend for people with learning disabilities, essentially saying that I’d be up for running the shop and check-in. The people were wonderful, but I also found it extremely exhausting and it took a lot out of me. I don’t know if I’d do it again, but I wouldn’t miss the experience. The people I have met were the most accepting, open, and loving individuals I have met in a long time – just simple acceptance of everyone. I saw how much I have to learn in that way.
The food there was difficult. I had taken backup, of course, and I used most of it. Others with various dietary needs, some lethal, were not so lucky – they had been told (as I had been) that their dietary needs were fully catered for, only to find that they weren’t and they had to spend hours sorting out their requirements and had to work hard at every meal to get what they needed. I was lucky in a way, because I didn’t absolutely have to… although I preferred fresh food whenever I could get it, of course, and just supplemented with backup. Protein was the easiest, but cooked vegetable turned out challenging and as for raws, I used all my backup. At least I’m not afraid, and I’m able, to speak up. Some of the people with learning disabilities found that really difficult and were intimidated by the staff who made us feel like a bother.
But, at the end of the day, I remained abstinent no matter what and I have learned again how valuable it is to have backup.
2 – Sponsorship
My heart aches for a sponsee who hasn’t been in touch for a while and the last I knew was that she was completely out of control, bingeing. I so wish I had a magic formula to give away. I so wish there was something I could say, a key message, that would finally turn the key in someone else. But the unfair truth is that abstinence was given to me by my higher power and unless/until it is given that way to another person, I cannot make it happen for them. I can only be their accountability point, taking their food, answering queries, listening to their troubles and fears. But I can’t give the willingness and I have no solution to offer to someone who hasn’t been given the gift.
Looks like I’m available to sponsor again. Contact me if you need a sponsor.
Despite the challenges and the pain (which I feel for my sponsee, which is a very real pain I feel) – I don’t eat, NMW, and that’s the best service I can do.