Today marks 4 months of abstinence for me. I quit counting days, but certainly didn’t quit checking my progress 😉
I feel very peaceful these days. I have peace around my food, and I have peace about my weight as it goes down. I just trust that it does, rather than agonizing and trying to tweak and change things so I lose more. These days, I exercise (if I do!) only because I want to, and it feels good. Like yesterday, I ended up going to Pilates class instead of Spinning, just because I felt like it, and I didn’t end up beating myself up inside because I hadn’t chosen the high-intensity workout. In fact, I would have been fine with myself if I hadn’t gone at all.
My sponsor said something to me very early in abstinence that has really resonated with me and that I keep doing now: she told me to drop the word “should” from my vocabulary. So when it comes to the gym, it’s not that I “should” go. I don’t feel like I “should”, any more. I COULD go to the gym. That’s a whole different idea here. I could go to the gym, or maybe go somewhere else. It’s optional.
As long as I weigh and measure my food, all other things are optional. I have a lot of options these days.
Thank you all for being here and continuing this journey with me!!