I wanted to thank everyone who has welcomed me, I felt so relieved to be among people who know what it feels like – and even if I haven’t yet had a chance to get back to you, thank you for welcoming me here. It was those emails that gave me the courage to go to a meeting last night, even though I was 15 minutes late (thanks, MTA) and had to walk for what seemed like a mile through a church hall to get to that meeting.
All day Tuesday and yesterday I’ve been reading, both on greysheet.org and on aa.org (they have the Big Book online!), nodding my head in recognition of the despair and the symptoms of addicts as I was stuffing my face. Food in hand, I wholeheartedly agreed with everything that was said on those pages. So when I came to that meeting, it wasn’t with even a day of abstinence… I came out of a binge right in there, and saw those ladies – it was a womens’ meeting – several of them downright skinny, and all with a peace about them that really impressed me. They’re taking this thing seriously, very much opposed to most “diet groups” I’ve seen in the past. They’re working hard on their lives, way beyond eating. Listening to them share bits of their lives was incredibly motivating, and made me realize that not only do I want this, I think I *can* do this! (think the Little Engine that Could – I think I can!)
Anyhow, after that meeting I found an available sponsor, was given a GS, and we went through today and what I was going to eat. I’m going to call her later today. I feel like I’ve been finally given the tools to be free, what an awesome feeling! I’m holding on to this for dear life now, and today for the first time ever I can say that I’m weighing and measuring 3 meals a day, and won’t eat in between no matter what.
Thanks all! I’ll stick around. 🙂